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Akbar-Birbal Ki Khichdi Reloaded

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Beep !Beep! “Aah!!! Got one more SMS from Akbar… I tell you he doesn’t have any work but to bother me with his stupid SMS - jokes and tweets.” said Birbal looking at his phone. He looked at his Facebook account and saw there were 50 notifications and 10 messages. Thanks to this mobile internet, people are now updating all the craps in facebook. Birbal started scrolling his facebook to see the updates.

Tansen has just uploaded his new song on winter in Youtube and is disappointed as Kolavri di has got more hits than his song.
Akbar once again purchased treadmill from Ebay.com to lose his weight. “ Ahh!! one more useless attempt to become Hrithik Roshan and impress queen Jodha….How can he lose weight if he keeps on playing angry bird all the time on his Nokia Lumina 800!!! What a waste of money?? ” thought Birbal.

Once Again, Salim has been caught red handed by principle as he was watching porn in class. Birbal said “He is the most spoil brat of this country”.

Suddenly Birbal got a Skype message from Akbar: Come soon to court. “Uff , in this chill winter morning, all I need to do is to go to court and hear all nonsense and stupid jokes of Akbar. I joined his court thinking, I will have loads of fun, servants, expensive watches and suits but all I have to do is to solve stupid cases of Akbar. Sometime I feel, I should start my own detective series just like CID. I bet I will grab more TRPs than CID and Adalat.” said Birbal.

“Yuppieee, one more level crossed!!! “ Akbar shouted seeing his mobile. “Akbar is really getting addicted to angry bird.” thought Birbal.
 
 Seeing Birbal, Akbar asked him “Why didn’t you update your status message in facebook and no tweet from past 4 hours??? Dude!! You are really getting boring day by day.” Further, Akbar said “Well today morning, I got a SMS from Vodafone, they are running a contest in which they will give 2MB data free to the person who stands in frozen pond in this winter. Since I am a King, so you need to stand in pond and win the contest for me. I need to win 2MB data at any cost”. Birbal thought “OMG!!!! He has really out of his sense now. How can I stand in frozen pond in this winter? This mad fellow doesn’t have any work but to play games and put me in such trouble.”
 
Bribal said “Jahapanha!!!, I am not feeling very well so can you ask anyone else to do this task.” Akbar thought little bit and said “I don’t care, you do it or someone else does it, I need 2MB data.” 

 “Common Akbar, use your common sense and search it in Wikipedia, why you always need me for such bizarre and weird thing” but Birbal just smiled and said “Sure Hazoor, I will find out the way to stand in frozen pond but may be you need to spend money for that”. Birbal is daam good in buttering.

Akbar said “Well Birbal!! I am OK with it, but will anyone will stand in frozen pond for the sake of money?” Birbal smiled and said yes. Akbar ordered him to prove it and win the challenge.

Birbal really got frustrated and thought “Oh Common Akbar!! I really doubt about your IQ. Cann’t you see me, even I am hearing all your nonsense, giving my valuable advises and solving stupid cases because of money …. Anyway I will prove it to you this time“.
Birbal opened Google in his mobile and searched how to stand in frozen pond in winter. He got to know that from yoga and meditation, anyone can stand in frozen pond. Thanks to Google, he found out the best yoga person in the country. It was Ramdev Baba.
 
Birbal activated GPS of his mobile phone to find Ramdev Baba headquarter. “ YIKES!! I just cannot figure my route to reach the office. Phew! Internet is such a savior in such situations” said Birbal. Google map has finally helped Birbal to reach Ramdev baba’s office.

Birbal asked Ramdev to help him in this case and in favor of that he will give full support in organizing yoga camp in Ramlila maidan. Ramdev Baba pinged one of his aide BalKrishna in FB and asked him to go with Birbal.

Next day Birbal took BalKrishna to Akbar’s court and told him that BalKrishna will do it for the sake of money. Akbar ordered the BalKrishna to be inside the frozen pond all through the night without any attire if he needed money. Akabr said “At any cost, I need to win the contest and get 2MB data free… So do not dare to ditch me”.

Birbal thought “Akbar has gone out of his mind, if Human Rights Commission or Vodafone people got to know about this, they will screw Akbar”. Birbal tried to ask Akbar to change his mind but Akbar is daam arrogant.  
 
 While taking this condition, BalKrishna asked Birbal “I need Rs.10 crore for this. I can’t stand in frozen pond in this delhi winter for whole night and also I will be bored standing alone in the pond”. Birbal agreed for Rs.10 crore and said he will take proper care of him in the night.

In the night, BalKrishna went to the pond and was watching Ram Gopal Verma’s Aag and Sunny Leon’s video in You tube in his mobile, so that he won’t fall sleep. Akbar phone was 3G equipped, so he was secretly watching the whole proceeding through video conferencing on his mobile.
 
Next day, Vodafone awarded 2MB Data to Balkrishna. BalKrishna transferred that data to Akbar’s name and came to court to receive the reward. Akbar refused to pay him saying that he has done cheating. Akbar said that BalKrishna got warmth from the light of mobile and withstood the cold as he was watching Ram Gopal Verma’s Aag and Sunny Leon’s videos.
 
Birbal really got mad on Akbar. He thought “What cheek! Akbar has gone out of his sense or it’s a side effect of playing too much of angrybird…How can he even think of such idiotic stuff…. Guess all those hours on his mobile playing mindless games has damage his brains after all.”
 
BalKrishna angrily went outside the court and informed Ramdev Baba about the incident.
Birbal got the call from Ramdev Baba and said “ Dude!! you ditched me, now see the consequences. I have good relation with DON, he is going to kill you and going to ruin your king reputation.” Ramdev also threatened Birbal that he will hack Akbar’s FB, Orkut, Twitter accounts and will complain about Akbar in Human Rights Commission. Ramdev Baba announced in a press conference that he will go for indefinite hunger strike if his aide didn’t get the money. Birbal tried to convince Akbar but he was too arrogant to understand.
 
Birbal thought “I need to save myself from Ramdev and Don. Hmmm… let me go underground till the issues get settled.”
 
Here Ramdev Baba started protesting against Akabr. He started a hate mail chain against Akbar and created a hate page for him in Facebook. Follower’s lists of hate page crossed the 1 million mark!!! All the news channels are doing SMS poll about the incident. Thousands of tweets are being done against Akbar’s act.

Shame on Akabr !!! # Shbana Azmi
Akbar is not fit to rule the country # Sushma Swaraj
Akbar is causing harm to his own repute by refusing money to BalKrishna # Anna Hazzare
Akbar’s friends stopped chatting with him and became unfriend to him. There was not a single message or notification on Akbar’s wall. Situation was getting terrible for Akbar.

Akbar really got worried and started searching for Birbal. He kept sending messages (on Skype, GTalk) and emails to Birbal but no response. Finally Akbar’s GPS located Birbal's where about. Google Map was showing Birbal in a Westwind resort near Jaipur. Akbar thought “How could Birbal be so insensitive and leave me alone in this situation where no one wants to talk or chat with me”. Immediately, Akbar booked the flight tickets from his phone and rushed to airport.

In resort, Birbal was having a very cool and relaxed time. He opened his phone to check today’s tweets.
On my way to Westwind Resort to resolve BalKrishna Issue with Birbal # Akbar 

 
OMG!!!! Birbal shouted “Akbar is coming to meet me”. Bribal did not know what to do next. He opened Wikipedia to find a solution of Akbar’s nonsense.
Akbar reached the resort and rushed towards Birbal’s room. As he opened the door, he saw Birbal had played fire video on youtube on his mobile and kept the pot of uncooked khichadi one meter away from it.
Akbar questioned him "Are you nuts or what??? How will the khichdi get cooked with no fire? It’s just a video??? What is wrong with you Birbal?"
Birbal, cooking the khichdi, replied "Oh my great King!!! When it was possible for a person to receive warmth from a light of mobile, then it is possible for this khichdi, which is just a meter away from the source of heat, to get cooked."
Akbar understood his mistake. He immediately called a press conference and apologized BalKrishna and Ramdev in front of the media. He requested Ramdev to take back all his protest and revive all his FB and orkut accounts. He also BalKrishna rewarded him Rs. 10 Crore.
Once Again Internet and Birbal’s wisdom has saved Akbar from a mishap situation.
Mobile and Internet has become an essential part of our life. So, I thought of giving our age old stories of Akabar Birbal a modern twist..

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